


When the coffee is gone

by Tree_no3



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-25
Packaged: 2019-06-23 18:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15612117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tree_no3/pseuds/Tree_no3
Summary: What could ever cause the avengers tower to run out of the number one source of life for all t's inhabitants, coffee?





	1. When the world falls into pieces

**Author's Note:**

> Profanity is used throughout the fic.

Tony sat, too horrified to speak, staring blankly at the cabinet. He heard Peter come up beside him.  
“Oh no,” the kid whispered quietly, “Are we… No we can’t be.” Tony took a shuddering breath, preparing to tell the kid what He and Clint had found. But Peter moved off, checking every nook and cranny almost desperately, as Tony had that morning when Clint had told him the news. Peter walked back to where Tony was still sitting, wide eyed with disbelief. “We’re out?” he questioned.  
“We are out of coffee.” Replied Tony flatly, “I’m sorry.”  
“Well, we can’t just sit here!” Cried Peter, “We’ve gotta do something!”  
“It’s ok, kid, Jarvis has it covered.” Said Tony.  
“Speaking of,” Said Clint. Peter looked around for him, and Tony pointed to the vents, “When will it be here, JARVIS?”   
“Why are you up there?” Asked Peter.  
“He’s sulking because I told Jarvis not to answer when he asked about the delivery.” Responded Tony.  
“I have a right to know when my savior is due to arrive,” complained Clint.  
“I'm not the one who was in charge of maintaining the coffee stores this week.” Snapped Tony, turning to face the ceiling vent Clint was hanging his torso down from.  
“Morning,” mumbled a very tired looking Bucky, who slouched his way over to the coffee pot.  
“Barnes, I should tell you the—“  
“Coffee first.” Mumbled the super soldier. He picked up the empty pot, and tensed, his former drowsiness replaced by sharp lines and frightening awareness. Tony resisted the urge to move a defensive stance as the other man turned towards him.  
“We’re out.” Tony said after a long pause.  
“No.”  
“What do you mean ‘no?’ We don’t have any coffee in the entire building.”  
“How.”  
“Honestly?”Tony asked, Bucky rolled his eyes, and nodded, “I have no fucking clue. I have the order for beans placed automatically once a week, and we have a rotating schedule of people responsible for getting more if we use more than normal in a week.”  
“Who.” Tony hesitated to answer. Ratting Clint out was wrong, but no response would be taken as it was his fault, and he was getting tired of always getting blamed with things.  
“Me.” Replied Clint, “But we haven’t had anyone over, any late nights, early mornings, or difficult days. There is simply no reason that we would have gone through all the coffee.”  
“That is true. No one has consumed excess amounts of coffee in the past week.” Said Bucky after a few seconds.   
“So what happened to the coffee?” Asked Peter.  
“That is a very good question, kid, and one I intend to get answered.” Replied Tony. “Jarvis, would you pull up the security footage of the kitchen, my lab coffee storage, the star bucks down stairs, my wall panels, my office coffee drawer, the cache in Peppers office, The one in… actually, can you just check surveillance footage for any unusual coffee consumption?”  
“JARVIS, when is the coffee gonna be here?” Begged Clint. Jarvis ignored him, and Tony smirked. HE lay down on a couch and stared aimlessly at the ceiling.  
“What are you looking for?” Asked Clint.  
“God.” replied Tony without missing a beat, “I plan to ask why the universe demands that I not have coffee.”  
“Fuck the universe, I want. now,” Argued Clint.  
“That’s not much of a heroic attitude.” Tony half heartedly retorted.  
“Why should i save the universe if it takes away my coffee. I may be a hero, but I know how to look out for number one.” Clint said, jabbing a thumb at his chest. This had the unfortunate effect of causing him to slip a little further out of the vent than he was prepared to go, and he barely managed to twist around and land on the ground in a crouch. Peter webbed the vent cover back up.  
“Peterrrrrrr,” Tony started.  
“Sorry, Mr.Stark, I know I’m not supposed to wear web shooters in the house, but I was out really late, and then i had homework, and then I kinda fell asleep without taking them off, which is actually worse than wearing them in the house, so can you just forget I said all that but…like…remember that I was really busy and am really sorry and so maybe not be mad?” Peter blurted.  
“Relax kid,” Tony laughed, “I’m not mad, just go take em off now.”  
“Yeah, ok Mr.Stark!” Peter said, already bounding up one of the stair cases.   
“You’re killing me kid,” Said Bucky when he bounced back in a few minutes later, “how do you have so much energy without coffee?”  
“It’s his natural state,” Clint said, now lying on the floor, he turned his head so he could see Tony from the corner of his eye, “seriously though, where is the coffee.”  
“Jarvis?” Asked Tony.  
“The street cameras on the street around where the delivery is are all turned off for a mile, I’m afraid I cannot monitor the car’s progress.” Replied Jarvis after a few seconds.  
“Sorry, what?” Asked Tony, “why didn’t you let me know the moment an entire street of cams turned off?”  
“The ‘Don’t fuck with my mornings’ protocol. You established it some 19 years ago. No emergency news or any kind of stress inducing news until after coffee. I’m afraid I was unable to notify you until directly asked a question whose answer was that news.” Replied Jarvis calmly.  
“You programmed JARVIS so he couldn’t stress you out in the morning?” Asked Clint, “That's amazing Tony, I wonder if I can have a ‘don’t fuck with my mornings’ protocol for Fury.”   
“Jarvis, delete the protocol, please,” Sighed Tony, “Ok, who wants to go check out the street.”  
“If I may, sir, I will be able to use the satellite to provide an update in 87 seconds.”  
“Ok, Jarvis, do that. But seriously, if there is something, who wants to go.”  
“I guess—“ Peter started.  
“No, not you, you are not going anywhere until Jarvis has eyes.” Snapped Tony.  
“But, besides you, I can get there—“  
“Ok then I’ll go, I travel faster. You aren’t going until Jarvis and I know more.”  
“If the cameras and phones are all out then the suit might go out too, so I should—“  
“what part of “No” do you not get? the N or the O.”  
“The part where I’m an avenger, but can’t go help when I’m the most suited to the mission.” Peter replied angrily, blocking Tony’s path out of the room. Tony sighed, he wasn’t about to let the kid recklessly charge off to an unknown situation, Tony had to check it out first, make sure Peter could handle it, make sure it was “safe” enough for the kid.   
“Ok, Im sorry, but no, I can’t have anything happen to you, ok? SO just stay here with Barnes, Jarvis will let you know what’s going on.” Tony flicked his wrists and the suit started deploying, it’s presence comforting him as it crept over his shoulders.  
“But… It’s my job. I have to go help.” Said Peter quietly. Tony turned back towards him, externally extremely cool, which was really hard for him to keep up when the kid was panicking him like this. IT wasn’t the kids job, maybe it was the right thing to do, but that did;t mean Peter had to do it. And it definitely did not mean that Peter should get into something he might not be able to manage ever again.   
“It’s not your job Peter. Your job is to go to school and get good grades. This is… a secondary hobby. Don’t go into heroics, horrible pay. And stay here with Barnes.”  
“That is SO true,” called Clint form the floor.   
“But…I don’t wanna be benched again. I wanna help.” Peter protested quietly.  
“Ok but you’ll have plenty of time to save people being the friendly neighborhood spiderman. You can’t help people if you’re injured.” Tony said, then he walked out onto the platform and flew off. “OK, Jarvis, what’s down?”  
“Sir, all electronics in the street for a mile and 14 feet distance are switched off. I cannot determine why at the moment. Satellite images are simply blank for the area.” Tony stopped the suit for a moment.  
“Sorry, say that again?”  
“They are blank, sir.”  
“Blank as in?”  
“there is no street in the satellite image.” Jarvis said.  
“Will the suit work inside?” Asked Tony tiredly.  
“I cannot say, sir. It has a unique power source, and because of a lack of data, I am unable to determine more. But it is a possibility that you should prepare for.”   
“Ok then.” Said Tony, concentrating on breathing and not crashing into a building roof.


	2. The blind spot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clint comes to look around with Tony when they realize the suit doesn’t work in the blind spot. Clint really needs the coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About 2/3s of the way in the story changes to be from Clint’s perspective.

If Tony was being honest, Peter really would’ve been better suited to checking out a complete lack of electric devices in a street. However, Tony’s new nano tech would be able to form hand held weapons that did not require electricity, so he would be ok if the suit stopped working inside so long as he could get out for long enough to take it off and produce said weapons from the nano tech and detach them, which wasn’t good for the suit, but fighting wasn’t good for it either and he did that alot so oh well.  
“Sir we are approaching the blind spot.” Said Jarvis.  
“Ok set me down on a roof with a fire escape on the inside but most of the building on the outside.” Replied Tony, “and if you would, try to come up with a different name for this, ‘blind spot’ sounds like a pizza.”  
“I will do my best, Sir.” Tony thought he detected a hint of sarcasm, but decided that Jarvis’s attitude was low on his list of priorities as he landed softly on a roof. Assuming it really was just the street that was part of the...blind spot...Tony figured he could get on the fire escape and the suit would either malfunction there or keep on working. Taking a quick breath, he stepped onto the ladder. His UI remained up, and he still had power in the thrusters, so he pushed off, deciding to fly his way down.  
Tony had never been afraid of heights. Or of falling. But falling with his UI blank and no connection to Jarvis was, Tony had to admit, really fucking scary. Theoretically, it should’ve been better than last time since he had already done it once, but that time he had been unconscious so the portal really didn’t count. Tony was starting to wonder when he was going to hit the ground, when it decided to make a guest appearance. The impact knocked Tony forwards onto his knees, and he reached forwards to keep himself from completely face planting, but they moved slowly and stiffly, too late to keep his forehead from hitting the ground with a clang.   
He pushed himself up slowly, his muscles having to move the joints and gears on their own. It wasn’t that the suit was heavy, and Tony had gotten around in a dead suit before, it was just more effort than he had planned to make that day the night before while he was fixing dummy and U after a prototype blew up.  
“Well, I’m a fucking idiot.” He muttered to himself, realising where all the coffee had gone. He slogged into an alley, and most definitely did not do a happy dance when the suit powered up again, “Jarvis, buddy, you there?”  
“Sir! May I say that it is quite a relief to see you,” Responded Jarvis promptly.  
“It’s nice to hear from you too,” Tony smiled to himself, “Tell Baton to come down, tell Peter that if even thinks about coming before i say ok he is grounded for a week and he should wear one of the older suits, from before model 19.”  
“I will pass along the message. Shall I initiate protocol 554?”  
“Yeah, thanks J, you’re the best.”  
“My pleasure, Agent Barton is en route.” By now Jarvis was talking into Tony’s earpiece, and Tony was waiting for the suit to finish dumping off weapons and holsters/sheaths.  
“Hey there Stark, look at you without all your gadgets,” teased Clint once he got to where Tony was waiting for him, in a spot where he could observe the street but not have to enter it. It looked fine, that is, it Tony just ignored about 15 crashed cars, 20 crashed bikes, a fallen over street lamp dangling wires, smoke, and general mayhem. Tony needed to work on what ”fine” meant.  
“Shut it, bird brains.” Replied Tony, “lets go.” They walked into the street, and no big scary monster charged out at them, and nothing disappeared, so that was nice. What wasn’t nice was that he still felt like he was in the dead suit, maybe a little bit worse, even. “Hey, people, I know this is New York and there is literally no sense of community, but let's not get so pissed off at each other because all your cars died and crashed!” Yelled Tony though a mega phone.  
“Fuck you, you can just go buy more cars and whatever else you want! Go to hell, Stark!” Yelled some idiot from where he was arguing with some other dude who had hit his car or something.  
“Oh my god…”muttered Tony, “you’d think they’d get insurance.”   
“So apparently yelling at people to get their shit together isn’t gonna work, do you have any good ideas?” Asked Clint.  
“Not really.”  
“Well me neither, so start thinking.”  
“Why do I have to come up with things, I don't see you coming up with a master plan.”  
“Because I’m not the genius, I’m just the stupid idiot who can shoot things with a set of sticks and some string.”  
“Well, when you put it like that…”Tony trailed off, not really knowing what happened when Clint ‘put it like that.’   
“Lets just go around, look for an epicenter, and keep people from hitting each other too hard until the police get here and handle this.” Suggested Clint.  
“Yeah, that’s a good idea, I mean, how hard can it be to find whatever drained all the power, let's just get this over with and then go to starbucks.”  
“Yeah, it’ll probably be some giant ass evil-looking shiny thing. This is gonna be a piece of cake.” Replied Clint.  
“Do you need me to pay for your coffee?”  
“Of course not, I have money.”  
“Do you need me to pay for your coffee?”  
“Yeah that’d be great.”

 

So Apparently, both he and Tony had been wrong, and it was actually very hard to locate the thing causing the power outage. Which was really annoying Clint because if Tony got too awake then he wouldn’t buy him coffee from starbucks, and Clint wanted his coffee.  
“Tony, we have checked the entire blind spot, there’s no obvious hunk of bendy metal,” Clint whined. Tony turned tiredly towards him,  
“What do you want me to do, Clint?” He asked. Clint shrugged, he hadn’t really been looking for a solution as much as complaining because he was tired and felt like shit, and just wanted to hang out with his dog and eat a sandwich, or take a nap, or both. Tony was saying something else, but Clint’s head started pounding and he had been nauseous for like… some long period of time. Clint looked over at Tony, he was having concentrating his vision, but it looked like Tony was shifting from foot to foot.  
“Are you ok, Tony? You look...something,” He asked.  
“Yeah I’m fine, just worried that [something mad? Laughin’?]” Oh, something bad will happen, Clint was an idiot.  
“It’ll be fine, worst comes to worse, we can just call the rest of the team.”  
“Yeah yeah, I know, [stop/pop] worrying about me, it’s annoying.”  
“...OK” Clint climbed up a fire escape, trying to see something that would help them out. He could’ve sworn Tony was yelling that it wasn’t safe to “perch on the rails like that,” but he couldn’t hear, so it didn’t really matter anyway. Ofcourse, it might not be such a good idea, he thought to himself as another wave of dizziness came over him. He fell over backwards, onto the stairs, and then down them onto a platform. Then it occurred to him he could just close his eyes for a sec because he was already lying down.  
“Clint get up or I swear to god…” Tony was looking down at him.  
“Ok, I know this looks bad–”  
“Clint, we’re [looking/cooking]for something that turns off all electronics on an entire street, and you’re taking a nap. Seriously, I know you haven't had coffee, but neither have I and your constant whining is pissing me off, so [please/peas/fleas] can you just stop?”  
“Stop what?” Asked Clint squinting up at Tony, the sun was right behind him, which it wasn’t supposed to be, unless it was setting, which he doubted.  
“I don’t know!” Tony half yelled in frustration, interrupting Clint’s train of thought.  
“There’s something wrong.” He told Tony. He didn’t really remember what, but Tony was a genius, he could figure it out.  
“Yeah, I haven’t had coffee. Let's get going, Clint.”  
“No there was something wrong. Something about the time.”  
“Well, it’s almost 12:00, you happy?”  
“No”  
“Ok, well too bad, stop complaining.”  
“Why are you so annoyed?”  
“Why are you so annoying.”Tony countered almost immediately. Clint sighed and followed him down the fire escape. Maybe Tony was always pissy, and he just never noticed, he didn’t really think so, but it was a possibility.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's not like Clint is the super genius, Tony can just do the work for both of them while he catches a quick nap or something like that.
> 
> Clint and Tony both struggle through caffeine withdrawal. And while Tony tries to come up with solutions, Clint just lets everything glaze over.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm planning to edit chapter 2 some, sorry I did not realize how un edited it was when i posted it.

Clint had given up trying to make himself focus. The universe had deprived him of coffee, it could all simultaneously burn to the ground for all he cared. But then he wouldn’t get coffee. So maybe he cared just a little bit. He could be both mad and caring.  
“Clint. Clint!” Tony half yelled. Technically he was continuously half yelling because Clint couldn’t hear otherwise, so it was a ¾ yell, or something. “Are you listening? I mean I kinda know you aren’t so whatever, fuck you, wait did I just say that out loud, I’m sorry.” Clint just stared at Tony. He was too tired for this shit.  
“Anyway, as a quick recap, I’m thinking I should try to determine what kinds of energy still work in here.”  
“Well there’s heat.” Replied Clint unhappily.  
“Yeah, no shit, stop being a smartass.” Clint just kinda sat. “Yeah ok sorry, I’m just like… REALLY annoyed. Clint, I’m sorry, sorry please don’t be mad.”  
“Yeah, no we’re good,” Clint said, rolling his eyes. He just kinda kept sitting there with Tony, vaguely wondering what they were doing. He didn’t really want to ask though.   
Ok, this looked bad. Two Avengers sitting on a bench by the side of the road. With a mess of car accidents in front of them, the civilians had been cleared out, so there they were, sitting on a damn bench. Different drones kept flying in, shorting and rolling in the ground, but then Tony popped up, Clint wasn’t sure why, but he was muttering under his breath. Toby bent towards the most recent drone, and picked it up, poking and prodding at it, nodding and making sad faces occasionally when he theoretically found something or something.  
“Yeah, so it looks like the …” Clintlet his eyes glaze over, and stopped reading Tony’s lips. After he went on, waving his hands, gesturing alternately to the drone and towards the tower, JARVIS, Clint assumed, Tony finally looked at Clint. He was smiling, but it wasn’t a good kind of “Nice to meet you” smiling, it was a “Tony Stark just realized how he could destroy the universe with a bomb the size of a pea smile,” which Clint found very uncomfortable to look at. Because no matter how mean the universe was to him, he still was dependent on it for coffee.  
“So?” He asked, after focusing his attention.  
“So?!? Clint, I just told you that I can use this probe and others like it to counterbalance the [words Clint didn’t know] because the [mmmmmolic...forget it.] structure of the [nufkdjx] causes the…” yeah ok Clint really didn’t need to know this. Tony was smart, he’d remember by himself, and Clint was so tired, and nauseous and his head hurt, and he needed coffee. Wait, he was supposed to remember the sun.   
“Tony.” Tony just droned on, ignoring him, “Tony!”   
“Huh, what, yeah?”  
“There’s something weird with the sun.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“It’s not supposed to be there.”  
“Look Clint, I know you are tired and stuff, but I am too, my head hurts, my arms feel like led, and I have a really short temper. I’m a mess Clint, so if you’re having trouble with the Sun’s existence, just keep it to yourself.”  
“No, it’s in the wrong spot. Tony, it’s probably like 12:30, or 12:45 ish, right?”  
“Yeah… so?”  
“The sun, it shouldn’t be where it is, it’s supposed to be higher over there-ish.” Clint pointed to where he judged the sun would be around noon in New York during summer.  
“The sun is in the wrong spot in the sky?”  
“Yes”  
“Why?”  
“Well I was hoping you might know, but if you don’t, I’m willing to bet it has something to do with a magical lack of electricity.”  
“Yeah, ok then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so sorry this is so short and so late, school started, and I have been really busy.

**Author's Note:**

> At some point I will probably finish this... however school is gonna start soon so it might take a while.


End file.
